Summer Plans

Every year right around this time, I get an itch and become super eager for summer time. I want to be out more than in, I want to play more than work, and I want my kids home. I get impatient with rules and I-should-reallys and daydream about gardening and swimming and reading and playing and daydreaming. yup. I daydream about daydreaming. I love daydreaming. and  napping.

We don’t  have any elaborate plans for the summer, and are staying close to home. I haven’t signed the kids up for any classes or camps, and other than BlogHer, we don’t have any travel plans.

it’s going to be lovely. I think. I hope. I’m going to have to check back in August when I’m tired and hot and cranky.

The kids and I planted a bunch of new flowers surrounding the front walkway last week, and around the front yard tree. I love the circle of flowers around the tree, it reminds me of a pixie circle, and if I allow myself I can see little fluttery beings living under the colorful petals and leaves, collecting dew drops to make secret potions and magical elixirs.

Yesterday afternoon we tackled the backyard, and purged the existing flower bed to make room for a teeny vegetable garden. I had already chicken-wired the bottom of the bed last summer thanks to a VERY. COURAGEOUS. gopher who taunted me pretty much daily before I wised up and put in the wire. He’s moved on to the lawn now. He may accidentally be killed with a pick ax. Soon.

Our backyard now boasts seven 4-inch plants: 3 types of tomatoes, a watermelon, a green bell pepper (totally wanted a red one, but the garden supply store was  out and the kids insisted they’d eat the bounty, and I bought it even though I know they were completely lying because it was on sale and I had another foot to fill), an eggplant, and the cutest little corn plant I ever did see. We also planted some pea and corn seeds. Kernels? Pods? whatever the dried peas and corn are called.

I hit the school supply store with my youngest yesterday and through an act of extreme restraint I didn’t buy everything in sight, and instead decided on workbooks from the Never Bored books—a series I hadn’t seen before. I got one for 7-8 year olds, and one for 4-5 year olds. I usually do the Summer Bridge books, but the kids get terribly bored after about 3 days, and I get annoyed and then I get annoyed at myself for getting annoyed. It’s a vicious cycle. This Never Bored seems to be what I was looking for—the activities don’t seem “schoolish” but involve problem solving and creative thought. My 4-year-old has done 6 activities in the past two days, though, so it doesn’t look like it will last the whole summer. I also got each kid a blank writing journal with appropriately-spaced lines.

My four-year-old BABY! dragged out the reading book, and we did 5 of the lessons last night in under 10 minutes. I guess it’s time to do it for reals.

And we hit the library. I had asked Karen a few weeks ago for some grown-up book suggestions, and she started a thread on BlogHer with some ideas. I printed out the list, and headed to the library. I wasn’t able to find all the books listed, but checked out a few that excited me. I have wanted to read The Poisonwood Bible for quite some time, but didn’t carve out the time to so. I’m about 100 pages in, and so far I’m liking it, although I find the jumping from character to character a bit annoying. I really like Kingsolver, though, and am pretty sure if I find a peaceful corner of the couch I’ll get sucked in and not want to walk away. Adam and I took a literature class together in college (back when we picked out classes together. calculus cured me of this romanticism.) and we were assigned The Bean Trees. boy I loved that book.

We checked out Old Town in the Green Groves which is totally tripping me out. It’s a “lost” Little House on the Prairie book, written by an author who pieced it together from reading unpublished journal entries Laura Ingalls Wilder let behind, chronicling two years that take place between On the Banks of Plum Creek and By the Shores of Sliver Lake.  I’ve read the kids the books up through Little Town on the Prairie, and we were excited to go back and read about Laura when she was 8-10 years old. In the second chapter, Caroline (Ma) gives birth to a baby boy, Charles Frederick (Freddie). Nine chapters later, he dies, at age one. I had NO idea there was another baby in the family. Laura never mentioned him in the other books, and now I want to learn more. This book doesn’t say how he died,  just that he did, and where he was buried.

The Television (insert creepy dum dum dum music). In past years, I’ve canceled the cable (we acutally have satellite,  but whatever) for the summer and we don’t watch any tv other than DVDs. We’ve already cut back on our cable (DISH) package due to the economy (I hate that phrase) so we’re already not watching much as it is. I don’t know what’s holding me back from going cold-turkey this year, but I think it might have something to do with The View and Oprah, which is probably not something I should share out loud. But I feel like they’ve been better this year! And I get to sit and drink coffee and veg while I fold laundry! ugh. I’m still decidering.

That said, I do like TV series on DVD and could actually use a new one, if anyone has any ideas. In the past few years, Adam and I have cranked through the following (and loved them):

The Wire, Veronica Mars, The West Wing, Commander in Chief, Arrested Development,  Weeds, Entourage, and Curb Your Enthusiasm.

We just finished the last Weeds Netflix has to offer last night. There is nothing in the queue. It’s kind of depressing.

So those are our summer plans, or lack thereof. What about you? Big plans? Staying close to home? Any DVD recommendations?

Turtle and Skittles are enjoying the overgrown grass and fresh air, too.

How to be Blissfully Happy

I went through the computer files yesterday, and PROMed some of my old writing, and the overflowing downloads folder that was causing the desktop to run slower than I’d like.

I found a folder of writing I did 3 years ago. I’m going to copy and paste what I wrote—I entitled it, “How to Be Blissfully Happy.” I wrote this to myself, during a time where I felt like I was just “going through the motions”—we had just moved again, and I was working full-time at a job I hated. Hated.

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How to Be Blissfully Happy

Why are some moms happy and others are not? Are you happy right now? Why? Why not?

Our family has moved a lot. 5 times in the past 2 years. That’s an awful lot. During all the turmoil, I kept finding myself thinking “when we get to XYZ, we’ll be happy.” I would rush through my day, doing as little as possible do “just get through it” so the next day would come just so everything would start all over again. I was moving fast, the family was moving fast towards our “new life.”

But things were happening around me without me truly enjoying them. The baby learned how to walk. I took the pictures and video like a “good mom” but I didn’t have the wonderment and the joy that I would have liked to experience. My elder daughter said goodbye to her friends—friends that were so close they felt like siblings. I was there—I again took the pictures—but I was thinking about “getting this done quick” so I could go home to pack.

Pack.

I don’t beat myself up for these things. I made a mistake. I’m human.

But, as a human, I have the choice to do things differently. I can choose to spend more of my day in a blissful/thankful/joyful/HAPPY state then in a sourpuss/frowny/nothing is ever good enough state.

Because that’s what I would wish for my daughters when they become moms.

I’m not talking about being the Resolve lady who answers from the other room “That’s Okay!” in a sing-songy voice when her kids say they just spilled grape juice on the carpet.

She must be on crack. Who in their right mind would do that? It’s grape juice! Grape juice stains!

But so does yelling. And freaking out. And closing cabinet doors a bit too rough. And being so mad that you want to throw things or hit.

Over what?

Grape juice?

On carpet.

Really?

Is that worth it?

But we all do it. We all get so caught up in the moment we lose our cool, our compassion, our quest to be supermom.

And we crack.

Those moms who appear on the outside to be supermoms–do they not have babies up at all hours of the night? Do they not have dishes to wash, a husband who works too much, kids who act ungrateful and the forever-growing Mt. Washmore in their house?

Or have they just decided to be happy?

Is that all it takes?

To just *decide*?

But I can’t be happy right now. I’m too fat. My house is too disorganized. My kids don’t listen. They don’t sleep, either. I have a deadline at work. My husband doesn’t help. And he’s losing his hair. And he never cuts his toenails. I need new bras. I have too much laundry to do. That lady in the grocery store looked at me funny. I haven’t done the baby’s scrapbook and he’s turning 14 next month.

I can’t possibly be happy right now. I have too much to do.

It’s up to you.

You are the boss of you.

You are in charge of every experience you have today and tomorrow.

You are your child(ren)’s best role model.

Choose to have fun today.

Choose to love a stranger today.

Choose to be happy.

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The computer stamp on this writing says May, and I remember my last day of work at this job being July 30.

Making the decision is the hardest part of all change. Once the decision has been made, you (me, us, the universe) can move forward.

Have an absolutely wonderful week.

“I’m not going to be that kind of grown-up”

Good morning!

I woke up about 45 minutes before the kids did today, and drank my coffee on the front porch. The sunrise was gorgeous—–every few seconds I thought, “I really should grab the camera,” but I didn’t. I just sat. It was lovely. By the time I snapped this picture, the kids were awake and the bright colors had disappeared.

The city has been repaving the street in front of our house, and will continue to work in the area for about another month. After 9am, the day is filled with the constant noise of heavy machinery moving and backing up. The whole house shakes, and the workers have to shout loudly in order to hear each other over the roar of the trucks.

It’s all very loud.

The quiet this morning was much-needed. I heard the garbage trucks a few blocks away, and even the garbage truck sound was soft and kind of comforting. I enjoyed my quiet time so much, I didn’t bother to go back inside to heat my coffee—I didn’t want to step on a squeaky floor board and risk waking the children.

It’s been warmer than normal the past few days—the kind of warm where you need to close the house up during the day and open it up at night. While I’m typing, the computer clock says 6:42 am, and I know that I should really get up and close the front door and the windows. I kind of like the routine of closing up the house and opening it again—-it sort of feels like a rebirth each day. I love releasing the stale house air and exchanging it for fresh when the sun sets.

Last week it was cold and windy.

super cold and windy.

And this week is hot—some would say really hot. Uncomfortably hot.

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Walking home from school last week, the kids and I were talking about turning into grown-ups, and the different responsibilities grown-ups have, and all that being a grown-up entails.

My seven-year-old muttered something about how grown-ups complain a lot, and my four-year-old quickly chimed in (she didn’t even miss a beat!) “yeah. about the weather.”

Lots of Sadness

I’m not comfortable with the phrase, “everything happens for a reason.”

In the past week, two babies in the BlogHer community have died. I don’t know many of the details, and I’m having a hard time accessing and processing the information.

But babies have died.

and it’s not fair.

If you’d like further information, run a google blog search or a twitter search for Maddie and Thalon.

Updated: This post on BlogHer lists the updated links, and donation sites.

An eight year old girl was murdered in the town we used to live in. The town where I happily opened the garage door and let the kids run loose in the driveway and street. I even ran inside to grab the phone while they were out there.

My thoughts and prayers are with these little ones, and with their families.

I’m so terribly sorry for your loss.

Creating a Mud Room—even if you don’t have one.

Our next house will have a mud room. Even if the kids have to live in a tent in the backyard.

I’m not a shoes-in-the-house person. I just feel more comfortable with my shoes off, and it seems that the kids prefer to be barefoot even in the middle of winter. I don’t ask that guests remove their shoes, although many do when they notice that ours are off. Our home is primarily wood flooring now, but our last 2 houses had off-white carpeting throughout, and the shoes-off policy really helped to keep the carpeting looking fresh and clean.

The challenge with this habit is shoe storage.

Most people house shoes in their closets—and we do have some in there, too— but the shoes that are kicked off at the front entry or in the garage need to go somewhere.

So we have shoe stations. I keep a basket on the front porch for shoes, we keep our everyday shoes in the hall closet, and some of the heavier outdoor shoes in the garage. The nice shoes are housed in the bedroom closets.

One of our other really cool things (thanks to my father-in-law!) is the garage kid sweatshirt-and-jacket rack. I was getting annoyed at how the kids would open the hall closet door and throw their sweatshirt or jacket inside then shut the door, hoping that I wouldn’t notice.

I noticed.

An easy solution would be to mount a few hooks on the back of the closet door kid-height, or to attach a wire extender thingy to the jacket hook thingy that we already have on the back of the door.

Instead, I did something even better. I asked my father-in-law to make a coat rack out of some PVC pipe at kid-height to keep in the garage. I LOVE it. The bar is 4 feet wide, and it’s 3 feet tall. For extra support, insert a wooden dowel into the pipe (Adam says it’s  3/4 inch-wide PVC). The kids now have no choice but to hang up their coats (because I’m terribly mean and make them), and I love it that since it’s in the garage the clothing can still be hung if slightly damp from fog or rain.

What do you do in your home? Are you a shoes-in-the-house person?

related:

• Managing Children’s Art
• Super Simple Spring Cleaning
• How to Company Clean in 30 Minutes (or Less!)
• Time Management and Social Media: An Oxymoron?

Teeny Tiny Thoughts, volume 2

seriously. Is it that hard?

Super Simple Spring Cleaning

It’s spring. Don’t freak out.

There really is no need to spring clean until you have The Daily 7 For a Highly Successful Household down pat and are PROMing on a regular basis. If you begin a large spring cleaning project like cleaning the garage or attic out before the rest of your house is in some sort of order, you’ll only get discouraged. Trust me.

There’s no point in cleaning the garage until you’ve PROMed the play room, the closets, and the stack of Real Simple magazines from the side of your bed—–you’ll just be tempted to put the stuff in the garage because you “have room.”

But! if you have been doing a pretty good job keeping up with the day-to-day stuff and the grime on the blinds is starting to get on your nerves, or you’re hesitant to turn on the ceiling fans because you’re not interested in starting a dust storm, it’s time to spring (or fall. This is an approximate twice-a-year list) clean. The operative word here is clean. Not organize, not straighten, not hide.

You do NOT need to do all of these things. Do what is the most important first, and go down the list. Give yourself an entire month to get through the tasks—this isn’t a race, or a competition. No prizes will be doled out if you finish quickly, nor will penalties accrue if you don’t get to something. Just put it on the next list.

• wipe down blinds, wash windows, and launder curtains. I like to use baby wipes or disinfectant wipes on the blinds, or a microfiber cloth spritzed with a degreaser (Fantastic, 409, Windex Multi-surface, or whatever I can find at the Dollar Tree). You can also use a vinegar and water solution, or Dr. Bronner’s—it doesn’t really matter.
• clean ceiling fans. I use wipes or a misted cloth again. Dry dusting will just disturb the dust and it will settle back down, causing frustration.
• clean kitchen cabinet fronts. If you have a lot of grease built up, you’ll need to use a degreaser. You can use a spray on/wipe off method, or wash with a little dish soap and water.
• While in the kitchen, clean range hood, the top of the refrigerator, and run the self-clean cycle on the oven. If you don’t have a self-clean cycle, I’m so very sorry. The spray-on oven cleaners work, but they take a while and smell horrible. A safer cleanser, although it doesn’t work as well, is to combine equal parts vinegar with baking soda and a few drops of dish soap. Spread the paste on the stubborn stains and let it sit for a few hours. Scrape off with a plastic spatula.

Once your oven is clean, put a layer of foil on the bottom (under the heating element if electric, and do not block the vents on the bottom if gas) to keep it that way.

• The bathrooms should be in pretty good shape, if you are doing the bathroom wipe-down more often than not from the Daily 7. If the shower stall needs some help, sprinkle a liberal amount of powdered cleanser (or baking soda) on the shower floor and agitate with a slightly wet scrub brush. Scrub up the sides of the shower walls, and in the door track. Let this sit for a few hours. When time has elapsed, run the water for a bit, then scrub again with the remaining powder. Leave the scrub brush in the shower to finish the job the next time you shower. For icky grout, the bleach pen works really well to remove stains. If you have soap scum on the shower door that won’t disappear, lemon oil (furniture polish aisle) works wonderfully—-just put a tiny bit on a microfiber cloth and the streaks disappear. Be careful using lemon oil on nicer faucets and fixtures, it can cause pitting.

To keep the shower sparking year-round, wipe it down (dry it) daily, and use a scrub brush every so often while in the shower to keep grime and mold from building up in grout lines. If you leave the door or curtain open during the day, the fresh air will help to keep mold at bay.

• Vacuum and clean under stuff. The couch, the stove, and the refrigerator could use a good cleaning behind/under once or twice a year. The washer and dryer are also on this list, and anything else you know in the back of your mind that should be done. You know what they are—-but you don’t have to do everything at once, or at all. If you do half the house in the spring, do the other half in the fall. Once a year for a lot of this stuff is plenty.

• Hose off the porch, the front of the house, and the lawn furniture. I like to pick a somewhat warmish day and let the kids run around in their swimsuits and rubber boots (or aqua socks). I spray off all the cobwebs and the layer of dust that has accumulated on the window ledges and the eaves. Your paint job will last longer if you do this twice a year. Since the hose is already out, spray the lawn furniture down.

• Big Projects. The attic? The garage? The storage shed? Don’t tackle any of these things until you feel satisfied that the house is in good shape.

• Many people choose to go through their photos during spring cleaning, and/or clean up their computer files. This makes a lot of sense, and only you know if you need to add that to your list.

That’s it!

One cool thing about the Totally Together book is that all these (and other) chores are laid out as weekly tasks to accomplish throughout the year, so you (me!) don’t feel overwhelmed at the change of the seasons.

Happy Spring!

related:

• Managing Children’s Art
• How to Company Clean in 30 Minutes (or less!)
• Clean Less, Play More