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Totally Together

350. DUDE.

December 16, 2010 by  


There are only 15 days left in this year. F I F T E E N.


I spent way too much time yesterday fiddling with a new BlackBerry that the wonderful folks at BlogHer sent to test out, review, and give away (the post won’t be for a while, though. I’ll keep you posted.)

I think I have carpal tunnel in my fingers and I’m a wee bit cross-eyed. I get it that I work online. I get it that I use technology daily, but I am JUST NOT a gadget person. After spending a good two hours to input 3 numbers, I gave up and made a pot of coffee.

I sometimes think I was born in the wrong decade. I like spending time at home, I like spending time with my kids, I enjoy hanging out with my husband, and my idea of a night on the town is dinner at a nice restaurant that isn’t crowded and then a walk around the block.

oh. and although I live spitting distance to San Francisco, I’d rather this dinner take place in the suburbs where I can find ample parking. for free.

I don’t think classrooms should have smart boards, I don’t think kids should have cell phones unless it’s for contacting mom and dad to pick them up from sports practice, and I am pretty sure we’re the last house on the block without a Wii. And while the kids have DSs (don’t know the plural of that)—they only use them in the car when we are on a long drive. I haven’t made this a rule, that’s just what seems to happen. The kids would rather play or read than videogame.

I haven’t succumbed to a DVD player in the car, either, and so far we’ve made it. This summer we’re planning a roadtrip to Texas and I still don’t feel like this is a necessity.


I get it that I’m not in the majority.

so I’ll suck it up, soak my hands in warm water (ooh, maybe with lavender!), and figure out how to use this darn thing.


daily 7

count your blessings…. they are probably people and memories,  not gadgets or devices, huh?

quickly write down the top 5 things that are the most important to you right now. Don’t think too hard, just do it. On a regular ol’ day, do your actions reflect these priorities?

clorox wipe off all the doorknobs. this is especially important if you gave candycanes to quiet 5 small children yesterday afternoon while you were on a conference call…

Post a comment · 17 Comments »


17 Responses to “350. DUDE.”

  1. Jen T on December 16th, 2010 3:56 am

    Dinner at restaurant…check (although there are some great restaurants in San Fran that I would totally suck up parking for).

    No cell phone for kids…check (my daughter seriously is one of the last of the 6th graders we know not to have one…and she rides her bike to and from school…and has sports and band after school some days).

    No video games other than the computer…check (although we did cave and get them iTouches for Christmas…they are 11 and 8 and have Leapsters, lol…my daughter is going to Australia for 3 weeks next summer so it will serve as a camera, entertainment on the million hour flight, and they can each listen to what they want in the car when we take long road trips…we are no TV/computer during the week unless it’s for school, though, so I’m not sure if we’ll loosen up with the iTouches yet).

    No DVD player in the car…check (although we did borrow one once on a road trip from ME to NJ…I was by myself, kids were 2 and 5…couldn’t figure out how to use the darn thing the whole way up and they watched one hour long show on the way back. Never did it again).

    We also have never done the kid music in the car…as a result my kids love our music, although they do roll their eyes when I pull out my John Denver CDs, same as I did when my mom pulled out her JD records, lol.

    Yes, you and I are in the minority. But I kinda like it.

    All that said, I got a BB in April (mostly for my at-home business…but I was traveling a lot) and hated it. I upgraded to a Droid in October and LOVE, LOVE, LOVE it. But it has become a slight addiction, and one of my new year’s resolutions is to not use it for anything other than a phone when the kids get home from school. Since I HATE talking on the phone, that should be almost never :)

    • Stephanie on December 16th, 2010 6:34 am

      I’ve heard great things about the Droid. Interesting to hear that it’s become a slight addiction!
      thank you for the commiseration. :-)
      I feel like such a fuddy duddy—-I’m just not interested in learning anything else new (technology-wise).

      I also HATE 3D movies.


  2. Sandy Cooper on December 16th, 2010 5:44 am

    We should be friends. And I will come to YOU. Cuz I want to live within spitting distance to San Francisco. Tho Louisville has some AWESOME restaurants. Date night for us is often dinner at a small local place that serves local produce in season, and then a walk. We could double date.

    We’ll pick you up in our horse and buggy just after sundown.

    • Stephanie on December 16th, 2010 6:31 am

      We’ll pick you up in our horse and buggy just after sundown.


  3. Melissa@HomeBaked on December 16th, 2010 6:36 am

    You’re not the only one! I have $9.99 pay-as-you-go cell phone without a camera! No Wii at our house (it’s bad enough between the DS, the computer and the TV–I have a son who is a Pokemon expert), either. We have borrowed the DVD player for the car on those 16-hour drives to Grandma’s house, mostly for the toddler, who can only amuse himself for so long. Yesterday I took away tv privileges, and it was such a calm evening. Everyone (kids, anyway) went to bed early!

    • Stephanie on December 16th, 2010 6:43 am

      ah, the no tv= peaceful home thing. Why I am I so hesitant to just turn the fool thing off again? I’m using my grandma’s GMA addiction as a crutch, but we have the same thing—-the kids play better, Adam and I talk more, and there is just a quieter atmosphere all around.

  4. Catherine on December 16th, 2010 6:58 am

    I agree with you about all this technology stuff! I don’t know if I could live without the internet, but when we have kids (it’s probably 3-5 years off at this point!) I am worried that it is going to be so normal for them to have phones (ie, mini-computers) they will be handed out at school! I think a lot of this technology does more harm than good because there is no Miss Manners or Emily Post out there explaining how to be socially responsible with all the POWER we are given.

    • Stephanie on December 16th, 2010 12:05 pm

      I agree. I really do. People need to come before things. The “keeping in touch” aspect is great with this technology, but when you turn away from an in-the-flesh person to turn to a device—? it’s just not good.

  5. christal on December 16th, 2010 9:11 am

    Stephanie, similar values generally will make people friends, and I think we make up cyber-friends, if that were such a thing…. you do make me laugh :)
    no Wii, no DVD in the car, one boy has a DS (the other is getting his first DS for Christmas this year, just graduating from the leapsters finally), no cable-the only TV the boys watch is PBS and that’s only for an hour a day and me and the hubby only watch 3 TV shows a week—yep, three hours a week, no cell phones for any of us (only a pay as you go we keep in the car/trailer for emergencies, and I don’t know the number). We do use our computer for LOTS of stuff so we are not in the dark ages or illiterate, and have caved in to Facebook because I love to talk. Many of the reductions were for financial reasons at first, but even after we could have afforded them, we chose not to because we liked the time and money to go to better things.

    • Stephanie on December 16th, 2010 12:07 pm

      because we liked the time and money to go to better things.
      this is really giving me food for thought.

      it’s so hard to go against society’s norms—even when you KNOW in your heart it’s the right thing. very interesting. I think we’re going to have a great family meeting in the very near future. xoox

  6. jaime on December 16th, 2010 11:43 am

    Yep.. I would sooo be hanging out with you all the time if we lived on the same coast lol
    My daughter is one of the last kids in her 6th grade class without a cell phone, and I feel no need to get her one. (and while she finds this ridiculous, I can tell, she doesn’t complain or beg for one, it’s just the way it is.)
    Both my kids love to read, and while we don’t have a no tv policy, they shut it off at least an hour before bed, and spend that hour reading with us, or reading alone in bed. (while I’m venting with you, can I just say how much I hate the idea of the Nook or Kindle etc.? I would rather I, or my kids, curl up with a good old fashioned book any day!)
    No dvd player in the car (just don’ t get it, kids should be able to go without tv for an afternoon of errands, etc.), and they have always listened to our music, and love everything from Johnny Cash to Bon Jovi to Justin Beiber. We always put on classical music while playing board games.
    Tho, I do have to admit we have a Wii, but they don’t have any games to play alone, we only play the family games (bowling, etc.)

    I always feel like I’m a little off the times. Our idea of a big night out is dinner and a movie. But honestly, some of our best dates have been silly things like going to Sams Club shopping without the kids.

    And I know I’m not the majority either, but I’m going to hold out as long as I can!

    • Stephanie on December 16th, 2010 12:09 pm

      We’ve had great dates at Costco and Home Depot! (the “caulk” aisle… can be quite interesting! lol!)

      I’ve never done the kid music in the car either. The few times I’ve tried to find Radio Disney it was very commercially and if I’ve got the radio on, I flip quickly when an ad comes on.

      it sounds like your kids are fantastic. LOVE Bon Jovi!! love him!

      • jaime on December 17th, 2010 5:17 am

        Thanks, my kids can be unbelievably challenging *who’s aren’t, right* but they are really great.
        And as for Bon Jovi…well, how can you not love him? He’s a staple in our house, we just took our daughter to see him for the first time this summer, and now there is a poster of him above her bed. I love it! It’s funny the things you can find to bond over when they are 11! Goes both ways, I’m a big Twilight fan too 😉

  7. jennibell on December 16th, 2010 1:42 pm

    We started books on tape in the car a few years ago. We do have a car DVD player but the kids would *rather* listen to a book on tape (4 kids — ages 12, 10, 8, & 7). We’ve been through the entire Narnia series, Harry Potter series, all the Little House books, dozens of Nancy Drew, and the list goes on. . .our library just got a few collections of American Girl and they’re super-excited about those. We only have PBS here and a “if you had school today and have school tomorrow then no t.v.” policy has always been in effect. We live away from my mom and brother — they won’t stay here when they visit b/c we don’t have television and neither think they can “live” without it so they get a hotel room. It’s their loss. . .we spend lots of time reading together, playing cards, board games and playing pretend/making up plays/playing school. Yes, even the 12-yr-old! Glad to know we’re not the *only* family out there like this. . .ha!!!
    And Stephanie, I was seriously “addicted” to all the “regular” shows (GMA, Regis, The View, etc.) and depended on them to tell time each day until we moved here and didn’t have access to those channels!! It took me a long time to figure out other ways to give myself background noise and “tell time” during the day and I can honestly say I still miss it BUT since my kids have never had it (or don’t remember it) they are growing up without that “need”, which I think is good. I confess, though, if we did have television service I would have it on when the kids were gone. . .and I’m sure other things would suffer so, for now, my computer is enough of a distraction!!!

    • Stephanie on December 16th, 2010 6:54 pm

      Love the books on tape! We need to get into those more—such a great idea.

    • Sandy Cooper on December 17th, 2010 7:45 am

      I love the idea of books on tape, too. We bought dvd players for long trips years ago and they are only used for those. We’ve always lived very far from family (used to be a 19 hour drive, now it’s 5). Since my husband works a lot, we don’t get to talk much in real life. Sad, but true. So when each kid has in his/her own movie and a head set for a few hours in the car, it’s almost like a mini-date for me and my husband. We talk for HOURS and it’s great. I always look forward to this when we take a road trip.

      I will be getting more books on tape, though. I love the idea of all of us listening to something together, too.

      You gotta look at the dynamics of your own family and do what works.

      • Stephanie on December 17th, 2010 9:46 am

        Sandy—I know what you mean about the long talks on road trips. they are my favorite times, too. I LOVE it when all the kids are asleep at the same time.

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