Making the Most of Your Time

 

Ah, time. There just never seems to be enough, and no matter how hard you try to stop or freeze it, it just keeps on passing.

Everyone always says they would like more money, but is it really money that they want, or is it the freedom of time they believe money can buy?

time to travel. time to garden. time to have a hobby. time to read. time to do yoga.

time to collect garden gnomes.

time to sleep.

Everyone is allotted the same 24 hours each day, so why is it that some people get more done in the day? Are they sacrificing something important? Do they not eat or sleep? Do they have a secret space-time continuum they enter when no one’s looking?

maybe.

Or maybe “these people” have made a conscious decision to treat time as an endangered resource and deliberately choose how each minute/hour is spent instead of allowing it to pass by without notice.

I have always said that I hate rules and I hate people telling me what to do. I still say that, but I know it’s not really true. It’s not true because I never feel more on top of my game as I do when I’ve got a plan in place and follow through. This could be as simple as a meal plan, a plan to pay off a certain bill, a list of chores to check off, or a game plan of how I’m going to teach math facts to my 6-year-old.

so why am I so hesitant to make a daily plan?

Human nature. I know what works for me, but the idea of making a set plan, or list of chores, or daily schedule sounds daunting and overwhelming so I don’t do anything and instead sit on the couch watching OTHER people live their lives on the television.

sound familiar?

We need to end this cycle.

This is it. Move forward from today. Onwards and Upwards!

The difference between successful and unsuccessful people is that the successful people do the things that the unsuccessful do not. –Brian Tracy

related posts:

time management and social media (an oxymoron?)

how to be blissfully happy

making a (non-cheesy) vision board

meal planning for dummies

the Daily 7 For a Highly Successful Household

Permission Granted

I’ve been doing an awful lot of thinking lately about the meaning of life. It’s a deep topic, I know.

I’m not sure that there IS a universal meaning of life or a one-size-fits-all version, but I am beginning to have a clearer view on what it means to me, and to my family.

and it’s pretty simple:

BE HAPPY.

That’s it. It’s terribly simple and ridiculously simplified, but at the end of the day, that’s what really matters to me.

Everyone chooses their own happiness—my happiness is not the same as yours. While I love reveling in a great drama showdown between the Real Housewives on Bravo, I do not want to live drama in my own neighborhood or circle of friends, and therefore change the subject when a girlfriend starts gossiping. While it’s a conversation starter to bring up the weather, I’d rather focus on the GOOD parts of the weather, not the bad. Rain brings flowers, sun gives us Vitamin D., etc.

Does that mean that I’m living in denial about certain things? That I’m acting like a PollyAnna?

maybe.

I recently met (super briefly) Steven Fogel, the author of “My Mind is Not Always My Friend“.

I listened intently as Steven explained that the voices in your head should be treated as a cabinet of advisers, similar to the President’s advisers. YOU are the commander-in-chief of these voices, and YOU get decide what to do with them. Do you take their advice to gossip, or get annoyed and lash out when someone takes your parking space, or do you take the time to step back and look at the entire situation?

Do you immediately get upset when the bag of flour gets dumped all over the kitchen floor, or do you take a step back and realize the flour got dumped because your 4-year-old was trying to make cookies all by himself? For you.

It’s a constant choice, and we’re all works in progress. No one is perfect, and I’m certainly not trying to make it seem as if I act appropriately at all times, because I most certainly don’t. There are days when I both rant and rave.

But I’m working on it. Because at the end of the day, the only thing that matters is that I’ve tried my hardest, the kids are warm, dry, fed, & loved, and Adam feels supported. All the other stuff is trivial.

fluff.

nonsense.

So what’s with the title?

I’ve titled this “permission granted” because I think it’s time that permission IS granted to just be happy. To be thankful. To count the blessings. We’ve had a really hard few years—all of us. Our country is at war, the economy has tanked, millions are out of work, education is plummeting, and people don’t feel safe in large crowds.

it sucks.

But this suckitude (sucky attitude?) is like a virus that spreads, and if you (I) dwell in it, it just spreads and gets worse.

and that’s not good for anyone.

January is practically over. Most people I know started the year feeling FANTASTIC. This was it. 2011 was the year that could do no wrong.

If you find that you’re having a hard time getting this FANTASTIC feeling back, make a change. Distance yourself from negative news/thoughts/feelings/people.

You are in charge. YOU are the commander-in-chief.

related:

how to be blissfully happy

I’m not going to be “that kind” of grown-up

how to make a (non-cheesy) vision board

Remember the WoMom!

I’ve started a Gluten Free TV segment and my very first guest is Shirley Braden, from Gluten Free Easily! click on over to stephanieodea.com to check it out.

Keeping your New Year’s Resolution

It’s January 20.

Do you know where your New Year’s Resolution is?

I’ve gotten some questions lately about how to keep a new year’s resolution—I did the slow cooking thing, blogged about it every day, and then last year posted daily (except on weekends) on this site.

How did I do that?

I just did. Failure was NOT AN OPTION.

I think many people go into a new idea, venture, or resolution half-heartedly and just don’t fully take the measures needed to succeed.

and that’s okay for (a great) many. They just don’t really care.

But if it’s not for you? DON’T DO IT. Don’t be a quitter. Decide to be different, decide to be better, decide to succeed.

You can absolutely exercise everyday if you choose to do so. You can absolutely lose 180 pounds with a common sense approach. You can certainly quit smoking, stop drinking, choose kind words over anger, and resolve once and for all to keep a simplified and tidy home.

Just decide.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you for your emails and comments wondering where I was—I’m here! Last week I was in New York, and am just now beginning to dig out of the email pile. The new book is doing well, and my days are (this week) filled with various interviews and requests for recipes/images regarding those interviews.

I’m going to do a local news show on Friday, which will be fun.

I’ve started some webTV episodes and hope to continue to post throughout the year. I’ve got two main focuses right now:

Real Moms Making Real Money (at home, in their pajamas) And How You Can, Too!

Gluten Free TV

the first two are up right now, if you’d like to take a look.

Creating a (non-cheesy) Vision Board

Happy New Year!

The beginning of the year is made for day dreamers. What will you DO with yourself this year? Will this be the year you finally get organized? Lose weight? Start exercising daily?

Will this be the year that you move to your dream house? Land the dream job? Find a husband? Get a guinea pig (or two) to love lots and lots for two weeks and then forget all about it (them) and leave mom to clean the cage?

It’s up to you.

No really. It is.

The kids and I made vision boards over the weekend while Adam played with his new iPad. He says he doesn’t need to make a vision board because he already has all he needs/wants in life. I could read this two ways: he’s either fulfilled with me and the girls, or he’s fulfilled with the iPad.

hmm.

I first heard of making Vision Boards because of the book and video, The Secret. Before watching the video, I was already  big goal setter, but liked the visual aspect of putting a vision board “out there.”

To the Universe.

did I lose you?

I know. It sounds terribly hokey, and I think believing that The Universe is going to respond with sunshine and roses just for “putting it out there” is far-fetched and naive,  but I do it anyway.

Here’s why:

1) Writing your goals down forces you to focus on what you really want. You want more money? Great. How are you going to get (attract) this money? Maybe the sign advertising for extra nighttime help at Kohls is a sign (HA! a sign sign. didn’t even plan that one…) from The Universe.

or maybe it’s a coincidence. IT DOESN’T MATTER. What matters is what you DO with this sign (sign!).

2 ) Some people are naturally more visually oriented than others. Flipping through magazine pages is relaxing, and when you’re relaxed and your guard is down, your mind can wander to images that jump out at you. Fancy platform heels and a skintight dress? Maybe this means that deep down you want to either step up your look this  year, or lose weight. Or both.

it’s okay.

Dream Big.

3) It’s fun. Art time is fun time. Let yourself have fun—there’s no need for perfection, and there certainly is no right or wrong way to make a vision board. You can hang a bulletin board over your desk, put words of wisdom on the bathroom mirror, cover your refrigerator with inspirational photos—it’s your choice.

My Vision Board is on the back of my bathroom door. We don’t have a home office, and  I don’t want to explain what this or that means to visitors/family, so I keep it to myself. This is up to you. My friend Kim has a party with some of her close friends and they make their boards together—do whatever is right for you.

But remember: don’t put the stuff up that you think other people want you to. This is for you, and you only. It’s okay to feel greedy, narcissistic, and ridiculous.

you’re in good company.

edited to add 1/25/11: There’s a  new software that’s downloadable and FREE! for making computerized vision boards. I love this idea—you can find any image (online, or from your own stash) to incorporate. Fun!

Also, Lauren emailed to tell me her great idea. She took a digital picture of her vision board and then uses it as the wallpaper on her phone and computer, so she’s constantly reminded of the things she’s working on/trying to attract. Fantastic!

related links:

How to make a vision board–Christine Kane

Host a vision board party–Corporate Mom Drop Outs

Life GPS–Scott Eblin (also a free teleseminar link for Jan 13)

Mapping out Personal Goals (internal link)

What on Earth is Personal Development Anyway? (internal link)

362nd day of 2010

362

I have a new book out today. I tested all the recipes and wrote this book before the baby was mobile. It was a challenge, but I knew that if I waited until she was moving around, I’d never get it done. There were days when I had 8 crockpots going at a time, and when they were finished, I’d hand out the food and fill em’ up again.

it was kind of nutty.

and wonderful.

absolutely wonderful. The baby turns 1 January 6, and she is all over the place. If she’s awake, she doesn’t hold still—toddling from room to room. Santa surprised her with a pink wooden toy kitchen. Today she spent a good hour banging pots on the fake range, “cooking” Kix cereal and shoving the soggy round balls into my mouth, one at a time.

I am so lucky to have this time with my children, and with this new little one. My heart breaks when I think about what would have happened if I hadn’t stumbled upon the idea of starting a crockpot blog.

she might not be here.

and that’s not okay.

Thank you. Thank you so much for finding me, supporting me, supporting my family, and for being my friend.

and thank you for loving your crockpot (almost) as much as I do.

Today:

daily 7

rework your personal goals. if you haven’t completed them, it’s okay. Most people over-estimate what they can do in 1 year, but under-estimate what they can do in 5. Tweak. Rewrite. It’s all good.

call a good friend and listen more than speak

a Merry Christmas Eve and Weekend

358, 359, & 360

I’ve promised Adam and the kids my full attention this weekend, and am going to stay away from the computer. I’ve checked email on holidays before, and always feel horrible when I get a subject line like:

HELP! DINNER IN 2 HOURS 4 MOTHER IN LAW

or

FROZEN HAM EMERGENCY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and I end up spending way too much time bantering back and forth with someone who has never used a crockpot, or wants to know how to cook one of my recipes in the oven.

I’m just going to stay away this year.

I have a tiny bit of guilt about it, but I’m trying really hard to put the *real* people in my lives before the virtual ones. This should be an easy assignment, and I’m embarrassed by how difficult it sometimes becomes for me to just stay off/away from the computer.

Have a very Merry Christmas, each and everyone of you. Blessings to you and your family. Thank you for your love, warmth, support, and kindness.

and thanks for sharing your own peanut cluster-type weaknesses.

xoxo steph

350. DUDE.

350

There are only 15 days left in this year. F I F T E E N.

freaky.

I spent way too much time yesterday fiddling with a new BlackBerry that the wonderful folks at BlogHer sent to test out, review, and give away (the post won’t be for a while, though. I’ll keep you posted.)

I think I have carpal tunnel in my fingers and I’m a wee bit cross-eyed. I get it that I work online. I get it that I use technology daily, but I am JUST NOT a gadget person. After spending a good two hours to input 3 numbers, I gave up and made a pot of coffee.

I sometimes think I was born in the wrong decade. I like spending time at home, I like spending time with my kids, I enjoy hanging out with my husband, and my idea of a night on the town is dinner at a nice restaurant that isn’t crowded and then a walk around the block.

oh. and although I live spitting distance to San Francisco, I’d rather this dinner take place in the suburbs where I can find ample parking. for free.

I don’t think classrooms should have smart boards, I don’t think kids should have cell phones unless it’s for contacting mom and dad to pick them up from sports practice, and I am pretty sure we’re the last house on the block without a Wii. And while the kids have DSs (don’t know the plural of that)—they only use them in the car when we are on a long drive. I haven’t made this a rule, that’s just what seems to happen. The kids would rather play or read than videogame.

I haven’t succumbed to a DVD player in the car, either, and so far we’ve made it. This summer we’re planning a roadtrip to Texas and I still don’t feel like this is a necessity.

But.

I get it that I’m not in the majority.

so I’ll suck it up, soak my hands in warm water (ooh, maybe with lavender!), and figure out how to use this darn thing.

Today:

daily 7

count your blessings…. they are probably people and memories,  not gadgets or devices, huh?

quickly write down the top 5 things that are the most important to you right now. Don’t think too hard, just do it. On a regular ol’ day, do your actions reflect these priorities?

clorox wipe off all the doorknobs. this is especially important if you gave candycanes to quiet 5 small children yesterday afternoon while you were on a conference call…

day 349: be thankful for modern dentistry

349

Well, all of my anxiety and all-around babyness was for nothing. I was fine. I AM fine. I didn’t even need nitrous oxide, I just used the noise-blocking headphones and cranked up some early 90s muzak.

I am such a dork.

Today:

daily 7

plan a meeting with your spouse. Yes, a meeting. Make sure you’re on the same page with end-of-the-year planning, budgeting, and all that good stuff. Talk about the future—there are only a few weeks to make good on the rest of your personal goals and any items left on the punch list.

Consider planning monthly or even weekly check-ins with each other. While date nights are lovely, they aren’t always practical for many busy families.

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.  ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, 1966

the weekend

345 & 346

How many of you unplug for the weekend? Do you stop checking email? Do you turn off the computer and cell phone?

I usually don’t. But I wish I did.

I feel obligated to check email, and so I do–sometimes obsessively. I need to change this. It’s not good for me, it’s not good for the family, and it’s not the person I want to be.

so I’m going to change it. It’s Friday, 4:04pm, and I’m turning off my drug.

this weekend:

keep up with the daily 7

wrap presents

spend time with the family

unplug.

it’s friday! take the day off

344

Happy Friday!

Chances are your to do list was mountainous this week. Take some time for yourself today. Play on the internet. Go for a walk. Paint your nails. Take a shower all by yourself.

enjoy your family.

enjoy your kids.

enjoy yourself.

xoxo

today:

daily 7 — delegate as much as you can

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