Getting Started: A Beginner’s Guide to a Clean and Organized Home
July 21, 2009 by Stephanie
Thank you so much for all of your sweet words about the State of My House. I’m relieved to report that it’s back to normal, or at least normal for us, and that the puking has stopped.
I’m so beyond thrilled to no longer be puking.
We also got to see the baby last week via ultrasound. He/she is swimming around and looks fantastic. I think it’s finally sinking in that another being is on it’s way.
For reals.
I was tickled at how many of you confessed that your homes resembled the way mine looked after about 6 weeks of not cleaning.
There were, um, an awful lot of you.
And that’s okay—-I’m not a judgmental person in the slightest. This is your home, and you’re the boss. But, if you’d prefer to not have your house look/feel/run that way, I’m here to help.
Get Started. Now.
The first thing you need to do is to do a quick clean. Get the crap off of the floor, and the surfaces cleared off. DO NOT TAKE a lot of time to do this—just start moving. My How to Company Clean in 30 Minutes or Less post will be helpful, but mostly you just need a panicked “I’ve got to get this place picked up” feeling in your stomach. Pretend your mother in law is on the way over, or schedule a coffee date with the snotty PTA mom for tomorrow. You need a fire under you to Get. It. Done. This isn’t perfection time, this is Action Time.
Overcoming Obstacles.
The biggest obstacle to overcome in any task is procrastination. In order to start getting your house in order—you need to start getting your house in order. Procrastination is tricky when it comes to orderliness, because sometimes procrastination masquerades itself as cleaning. Do not alphabetize the spice cabinet if you have a mountainous pile of dishes precariously balanced in the sink. Do not worry about cleaning out the garage if you can’t navigate through the family room.
When my second child was a baby, I had friends over for coffee. I realized there was laundry strewn all over the place, but I was so tired I truly didn’t care. One of my friends wanted to free a chair so she could sit down, and began folding the towels that were scattered all over. While she folded, I began feeling more and more uncomfortable. I didn’t join in to help, or tackle another chore in the house. Instead I stood and watched until I finally blurted out that she was folding my towels wrong. I wanted my towels folded in thirds so they “looked pretty” in the linen closet.
To this day, I’m embarrassed by what I said/did. When your house is on fire, you don’t stop to weed the flowerbed. You act, and act quickly. It makes no sense to have a pretty linen closet if you can’t get to it because the floor is littered with clutter and the house feels cramped and chaotic. I promise there will be plenty of time to organize the towels and sheets. But not until the living spaces of your house are comfortable and orderly.
Another obstacle to overcome is over-cleaning. Do not waste precious time cleaning something that is already clean. Many of the things moms spend the most time scrubbing are actually pretty clean already. Toilets, showers, sinks, dishwashers and tubs are essentially self-cleaning. They need a bit of help to keep them gleaming, but they really don’t need to be scoured weekly or even monthly if they are cared for properly and dirt and grime isn’t allowed to settle in and get comfortable. Once your house is picked up, you can go back and thoroughly clean whatever needs it.
And Then…
Once your house has been quickly picked up, you can go do That Which Bugs You The Most. This is psychological cleaning. If you have a weird bathroom phobia, you might need your toilets to be pristine and have blue water in order for them to feel clean to you. Or you might need to sterilize your kitchen countertops with a bleach solution. Everybody has a different hot button, and for some reason it just needs to be taken care of in order for the house to “feel clean.”
For me, it’s the kitchen floor. I hate our kitchen floor. Hate is a super strong word, but it’s true. I absolutely hate it. We have a small kitchen, so thankfully the icky floor isn’t very many square feet. We have a black-and-white checkered linoleum, and it is a bear to keep clean looking. Any fleck of dust or crumb on the black squares show, and foot prints, and dirty spots appear on the white squares within seconds of a good mopping. In order for it to feel clean to me, I need to scrub each and every square with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser, then go back and quickly mop with cleanser. It takes about an hour, and I only do it when I feel completely icked out.
And Then…
Stop. Take a break. Stop working. Instead, call a family meeting and start brainstorming about chores, The Daily 7, and PROM. Your family, your spouse, and your stuffed cats need to help. The house doesn’t get destroyed by just one person, and it doesn’t need to be cleaned by just one person. I will post about chores for kids in detail, but please know that at about age 18 months, children can with assistance clear their own dishes, help load and unload the dishwasher, and tidy up their own toys. If you have dumpers in the house (not a poop reference. Dumpers are children who empty out containers of toys and then don’t pick them up.), get rid of some toys. Put them up high, or put them into storage in the garage or attic. Children shouldn’t have free reign of All the Toys In the World until they respect them and clean up after themselves.
My friend Alison, is a homeschooling mom to 9. She once shared with me advice that I find myself repeating to myself a few times a day when I’m feeling “mean”: “you are not raising children. You are raising capable adults. Every child should leave the home knowing how to make a meal, sew on a button, do laundry, mow the lawn, and milk a goat.”
Once your family is in agreement that a clean(er) house means a happier mom, you will find hidden time where you can tackle the projects that have been bugging you.
More to come—-I’m off to BlogHer, and want to change the beds and vacuum before we leave. I love coming home to vacuum lines on the carpet. 
Hey Steph-
I just wanted to say thanks for all of your tips! I was going crazy because….ahem…my house was a disaster and I had to get it ready to sell. I followed your tips and I have to say…..when realtors came in my house they asked me if I hired someone to do the cleaning. Me! Mrs. Slob! My house was under contract within a week! So thank you so much! I cant wait to start over at a new house and set up a routine so I wont have to do the super bail out I did this time. 3 years of neglect and dust……ew. It was bad!!!!
U rock!!! 
“she finally blurted out that I was folding her towels wrong”
Is it wrong that I wonder if you were talking about my mother?!?
I know you weren’t, because the prefers hers folded in half length-wise, then in half horizontally, then in half horizontally once more. Then stacked with the folded edge facing out (so you don’t accidentally grab more than one towel). I still remember getting the towel-folding lesson when I was a kid. To this day, I fold mine the same way. And I like them all stacked together in sets in the linen closet.
But I’ve got bigger fish to fry right now – starting with every other horizontal surface in my house.
Thanks for all of the advice – and encouragement – that I always find here!
(And, glad to know that you are feeling better!)
This is great! We have a 3 year old and a four month old and I started back to work full time last week. My husband and I have been using your daily 7 to help us remember what needs to be done (to help us feel good) when we are half asleep! Good luck at BlogHer. Glad you are feeling better.
I’m bummed that your book/ journal but I’m LOVING this website. I’ve referred friends to it (even though I confess that I’m not exactly living it myself yet).
I just had my 2nd child and hope to stay home, which will mean letting go our beloved bi-weekly cleaning lady and doing it myself. Your philosophy and methods are so practical and suit me perfectly!
Keep it up, and thanks!
Well duh, I forgot “was canceled” in the first sentence.
this is really good – THANKS!
In spite of my comment on your last post, please know that I’ve been taking your tips to heart, they are working, and WHY WON”T SOMEONE PUBLISH THIS WOMAN”S BOOK?!
Seriously.
“When your house is on fire, you don’t stop to weed the flowerbed. ” I love this! My MIL needs to read this post. If you’re doing a massive cleaning for the holidays do you really need to reorganize the game cabinet that NOBODY will see or use? Probably not. That being said, you can tell that “inviting the MIL over” as motivation to clean won’t work for me. The ex-MIL might work though.
I used to fold my towels in thirds but stopped when I realized that a.) it took way longer to fold them that way and b.) they seemed to take up more space than if I just did a half-half-half fold (is it possible or just my imagination that a tri fold makes them poofier?) and since I have limited space for towel storage I abandoned the tri fold and I’m happier. How pathetic!
I love the concept of picking your battles. It took me a while to learn, but I finally did. My husband always folds the towels wrong. Always. I used to gripe and do it over, but now who cares. At least he’s folding the laundry!!
I am so glad that there is towel debate. My man doesn’t think it’s a big deal so when he “helps” by folding the towels they are folded differently than mine. So then there are…TWO DIFFERENT FOLDING STYLES IN THE LINEN CLOSET… and then i lose it and refold every single towel to make them all look the same. I am not crazy… not even a little, But this is serious! How on earth can you put bi folded towels in the same closet on top or underneath trifolded towels and not have your skin crawl? Steph, i’m glad you feel better! I puked all the way till the end with my second. But that was payback for not barfing once with the first!
Any room in my house that has toys in it has toys on the floor, evenly spread out throughout the room. My husband and I even have a joke about it. It is definitely time to start teaching the kids to clean up their toys.
Thanks for all of the humor and wisdom.
Glad to hear that you are feeling better. My oldest once asked me while we were ‘deep’ cleaning who was coming over. When I replied no one, he stopped what he was doing and asked, ‘then why are we cleaning? we only do this when someone is coming over.’ I have gotten better about keeping things decluttered but the bar in the kitchen seems to always take the brunt of it since it is right by the front door. Any suggestions? never ending battle there. LOVE all your ideas. Keep ‘em comin’. Enjoy your time at blogher!
this is the actual “ridiculous dreaded towel friend”,
and though I am glad you’ve gotten good use out of this story time and again, it’s not exactly how I remember it, THANK YOU for folding the towels in my clearly messy house. I’m sorry I corrected you then (the shelf where the towels go is just tiny, that was the only point I was trying to make then, and we were both laughing about it, and my shifting discomfort was embarrassment that you were cleaning at my house, and because I just wanted to relax and chat, NOT work…), I’ve regretted it for years…
I was very overwhelmed with life and three kids very close in age back then. And still today. haha… And I still have laundry on my couch. (and yup, lots of people have far more kids, and are FAR more organized than I will ever be!!) Probably always will have laundry on my couch, and I’m okay with it. I also have three happy, thriving daughters. It takes all sorts!!
and congrats on your pregnancy!!! So excited for you!!!!
Hi Steph,
I have a thing about my kitchen floor too. I break out the steam mop when I can’t take it anymore. For that brief moment in time when the floor is perfectly clean all seems right with the world. Too bad it doesn’t stay that way!
Cheers,
Cinde
Visit my website for family friendly gluten free recipes:
http://www.glutenfreetasteofhome.blogspot.com
Just a thought…
“I hope that my child, looking back on today,
remembers a mother who had time to play.
Children grow up when you’re not looking,
there will be years ahead for cleaning and cooking.
So hush now cobwebs, dust – go to sleep
I’m rocking my baby cos babies don’t keep “
Excellent article. I quite liked the view. thanks for such nice thought sharing and the article also.
Thank you so much for this motivation. I too have taken a total pass on the housework due to pregnancy illness. While at 23 weeks, I am clearly not going to stop puking, this post gave me the inspiration I needed to reclaim the house. Now I am back into doing my version of The Daily 7 and have actually gotten the rest of the place under control.
I especially like the part about brainstorming with the family. I live with a 2 year old and a nuclear physicist….need I say more? The step of saying “hey guys, I bet YOU could do The Daily 7 too” has revolutionized the process. I add the disclaimer that DH is a great guy and will always help…when asked. So now the asking is done and so is the housework!
Great stuff, I love your blogs and wish you so much luck with your book, hopefully books, and your expanding family.
a reader directed me here–thanks for the great tips:)
i, too, am pregnant and struggle with lovely three trimester nausea. my midwife suggested Unisom–i take half a tablet when i’m feeling yucky, and a full tablet if i feel sick before bed. it works well (and doesn’t make me sleepy.) you should ask your doctor about it.
my pregnant sister-in-law swears by a bottle of essential oils–lavendar, basil, and peppermint–that a holistic, aromatherapy masseuse gave her. she gave me one too, with instructions to have my husband rub my feet with the oils each night. honestly, i don’t know if it curbs nausea, but what pregnant woman can’t use a good foot rub??
may you continue to feel better!
Jen, what wonderful news! I’m so glad to be of any and all help. Congratulations!
xoxo steph
LOL, RLR! I actually prefer my towels folded the way you describe, too. Ito does look nicer in the linen closet, but you’ve definitely got to pick your battles.
oxoox steph
I love you, Kirsten!! And I love it that you let me continue to tell this story. You completely rock, and are an extraordinary person, and I’m so blessed to be your friend.
Thank you for your continued wonderfulness. Hugs to you and your girls! xoxooxo steph
I’ve always adored that poem, Anya. Thank you for posting it.
xoxo steph
Hi Alexis, I’m happy to help in any way. I’m so sorry to hear about the continuing morning sickness, ugh. and YAY for helpful dhs!
xoxo steph
Hi Suzannah,
thank you for the fantastic ideas! The peppermint foot rub sounds heavenly…
xoox steph