Write On / Wipe Off Chore Charts

 

It’s 2012. I’ve spent the last four years of my life on the internet, and I love how I continue to learn new things. I developed a slight addiction to Pinterest over the holiday break (what? it was only supposed to last a week and I stretched it into a month? shhh. don’t tell anyone.) and learned that you can make ANYTHING into a white board with a cheap dollar store picture frame and a dry erase marker.

I think I’m in love.

The above frames were made in about 37 minutes. It took me a while to figure out the actual dimensions of the frame– 8 x 10 means that if you’re using a power point presentation you should size your project for 6.6 x 9.

You’re Welcome!

 

Another Thing to Note:  the glass at the dollar store breaks really, really easily. I broke the glass on each of these frames, and ended up going out into the shed to find old pictures to steal the glass (one might of been from Adam and his college friends. oops.). I’d maybe find cheapish frames at Kohl’s or Target that match instead.

 

My kids don’t seem to care that I’ve written a housekeeping journal/planner, or have developed a clever acronym for decluttering. They also don’t care that I get thank you notes every day in my email box which continues to perplex my #butIhelpotherpeoplewhydoesntmyownfamilylisten crazy brain.

it’s okay. I’ve come to terms with it.

Anyhow, I wrapped these chore charts up and handed them to my 7 and 10-year-old daughters (their names are on the charts, but I’ve covered them with tape because I’ve promised Adam I won’t exploit the kids on the internet) as New Year’s presents.

My 10 year old rolled her eyes, but my 7-year-old was uber excited and got to work checking things off her list immediately. If you’re looking for a guideline for age-appropriate chores, this list is a good one. Our picture frame chore charts have now been in action for exactly one week, and so far so good.

How was your New Year’s? Any big ideas for 2012? Did you make a vision board?

it’ll be a good year. I promise.

 

guest post: Why Working From Home Isn’t Just a Pipe Dream

Winning the Game of Life. (wait, is this all just a game?)

This is the exact game box that’s collecting dust on the closet shelves in the family room at my parents’ house.

I haven’t played with it in over twenty years.

because it takes too long.

… insert metaphorical psycho babble…

When things are going well, does that mean that you are #winning (thank you Charlie Sheen!) the Game of Life?

Does that mean that others are losing?

if you are sick, or hurt, or hungry, or worried, or disorganized, or scared, or poor, does that mean you are #losing?

Does that mean that your situation was just the luck of the draw, or that you must simply play the hand you’re dealt?

that can’t be the case. it just can’t be.

No one has all the answers on how to play this game. No one can anticipate all the wildcards and roadblocks Life brings. The only thing that seems to work, is to pull out the directions, smooth out the creases and recommit to staying on course.

 

 

 

 

When All Else Fails, Put One Foot in Front of the Other

Adam ran a full marathon yesterday. Today he is taking a lot of Advil.

I had over four hours to sit and think by the finish line while I waited for him to reappear— and when he did, I finally exhaled a breath I didn’t realize I was holding.

I think a lot of us are holding our breath.

release it.

you are doing a great job.

already.

 

 

Remember being young, and not being able to wait for the next thing to happen? Christmas. Your birthday. The new school year. You counted down the months, the weeks, the days until the Next. Big. Thing.

Most of us still do this.

I can’t wait until I’m married. I can’t wait until we have a house. I can’t wait until we have a baby. or two kids. or three.

I can’t wait until we re-do the kitchen. Until we go to Europe. Until we have a bigger house.

Until we retire.

Until we win the lottery.

STOP.

Don’t wait to start living your life the way you want to—- just begin. The race has already started. You can fight it, or you can get caught up in the music, the frenzy, the cheering, and put one foot in front of the other and begin running.

but I don’t like my shoes.

and I don’t have one of those GPS watch-thingies.

If you are reading this, you have access to the internet. And probably own many more things than you need. Most likely you have a warm bed and and a full belly each night.

You are already winning.

and you are so very blessed and so very lucky.

appreciate it.

breathe deeply—- and appreciate it.

 

When you cross the finish line, what do you want it to look like? Do you want your chest puffed up, full of pride, while you smile for the cameras? Do you want to wave your arms around, all silly, and quack like a duck? Do you want to cross and then immediately fall in a heap and proclaim: “never, never, never again”?

Will you limp across? Will you crawl across? Will you feel triumphant, or will you feel defeated?

Every Day is a New Gift.

No, really: Every Day Is A New Gift.

do you feel that way today? will you feel that way tomorrow? what do you need to do to get to that point?

PS: it’s not going to be a new kitchen…

 

Conversations with Coke Recap

This is a compensated post. Coca-Cola paid for my travel, lodging, and activities in Atlanta, and BlogHer is paying me to write this post.

I am back, safe and sound from Atlanta from the Coca-Cola event. I feel fresh and renewed, and it doesn’t really have anything to do with the insane amount of Coke Zero I had on this trip.

For the record? I really like Coke Zero. I was too cheap to buy and test it out myself, but since Coke flows freely and readily within the mothership, I had the opportunity to taste test approximately every 3.5 seconds. I am not a Diet Coke fan, but like Coke Zero.
A lot.

I got an awful lot of rather um, interesting comments and questions about this trip. I was ready for these questions, but the tone and the (perceived) anger from some of them kind of threw me for a loop.

To the point that I kind of wanted to hide in a corner and suck my thumb and twirl my hair.

And that’s not okay.

I will never ever ever try to get you (or you, or you) to buy something you do not want to. I would never try to make you feel bad for your choices or for what you choose to feed or serve your family.

Please don’t do that to me.

I’m not an all-or-nothing kind of girl. I like all-natural, organic food, but I also like Cheese in a Can. I try my hardest to get us to all sit down to eat dinner together at the table, but sometimes the best thing is to spread out a blanket and watch TV while shoveling it in.

And I’m okay with it.

I’m supposed to write what I learned these past few days at Coca-Cola’s headquarters. I should probably write that the nutritionist and scientist told us that your body metabolizes high fructose corn syrup, aspartame, and cane sugar the exact same way. I should refer you to their website: TheBeverageInstitute.org to read the studies and form your own decisions.

I should tell you that McDonald’s sponsored our lunch (McDonald’s is the largest distributor of Coke products) and that the Asian Salad is quite tasty, the dressing is Newman’s Own (NOT GLUTEN FREE) and only has 90 calories (the dressing, not sure what the whole salad has, but that  info is readily available online) and that the new smoothies taste fantastic and my kids really like them for an afterschool snack.

One of the biggest and hugest highlights of the trip was listening to representatives of Coke’s Women in Leadership program. They spoke about the importance of listening to women and understanding their background. That women everywhere struggle with balance and feelings of guilt and worries of not “being perfect.”

The powerful quote of the day was their leadership motto: Lift as You Climb.

I learned that women need to be nicer to each other.

A LOT nicer.

And we need to learn how to support and nurture each other and stop making snap judgments.

Because at the end of the day, everyone is just doing the very best they can within their own circumstances and situation. And you should love and cherish that person—even if their choices are somewhat different than your own.

And these women? I couldn’t have been happier with this amazing, powerful, confident grouping. I feel honored beyond words to have met and spent time with them.

Women truly CAN change the world. I know it. But first, we’ve got to stop pushing each other down and start holding hands and supporting.

Lift As You Climb.

I am thrilled to introduce (starting at the top right and working down the stairs):
the guy is Phil, he was our Coke tour guide and archivist. super nice guy.

Creating Motherhood, Calliope

Doobleh-Vay, Amy Turn Sharp

Sweetnicks, Cate O’Malley

VodkaMom,

BusyMom

MochaMomma

Joy Unexpected, Yvonne

The Meanest Mom, Jana

Home 2 3 Duncan Boys, Lakeitha Duncan

Three Kid Circus, Jenny Lauck

Bongga Mom

Kirida, Mona

Take the time to meet these women and read their stories. We can learn so much from each other.

I’m in the midst of a new site redesign (nothing will change, but it will all be different. don’t freak out.) and would like to start an everyone-is-included blog/website roll. If you have a site that you’d like included and you’re a REAL person and not some spam monster, please email me at contact@stephanieodea.com (I’m the contact!) with the subject line: blogroll and I’ll get you on the list. This roll will constantly be updated—it’s time we reach out and support one another.

Thank you for your love and support, and have a wonderful day.

How To Be Balanced While Looking for Balance

I was asked last week if I had a personal motto. I hesitated for a second, then blurted out:

THIS IS REAL LIFE, NOT A MAGAZINE.

I didn’t know that had been floating around my inner thoughts, but once I said it, I felt an enormous release of positive energy.

This is it. This is for real. I do not expect my children to be robots, so why should I expect to be “on” all the time? Why should I expect my cupcakes to look like the way they do on TV, or my garage shelves to be color coordinated? Why should I beat myself up if I happily feed my kids apple dippers from McDonalds every Wednesday because that’s our early-out day and it makes them happy, and if they’re happy then I’m happy?

I shouldn’t. and neither should you.

Sandy wrote this in the comment section of the post I did the other day:

As much as I’d love to, I cannot do everything I want to do in a day. Trust me, I’ve tried. I cannot work out (P90X week 11, baby!!!), pray, read my bible, wipe down all my bathrooms, do 2 loads of laundry, cook a healthy dinner from scratch, write a witty blog post, drive my kids all the places they need to be, have s*x with my husband, blow dry my hair and play doll house with my 4 year old all on the same day. So I’m learning to prioritize the things that matter the most to me and let the other things go. FYI, it’s usually the s*x that I let go.

I love her honesty, and I know for a FACT that she is the norm. We all are. It’s hard work (really hard work) not not constantly feel as if you aren’t measuring up. I absolutely agree with Sandy that it’s impossible to be the perfect trophy wife and mother and it’s a futile effort to even try. I’m proud of her.

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I’ve got a kid home sick with me today. She’s been vomiting every 90 minutes, and is snoring away at the foot of the bed (where I’m sitting, typing). I hate it that my first thought when she got sick last night was that it was going to “ruin” my day.

I am so ashamed.

My day was not ruined.

The world will keep spinning even though I didn’t post the General Tso’s chicken recipe along with all of the other Chinese food recipes I’ve made. I thought I better squeeze that post in before February was over, because that’s when Chinese New Year is celebrated.

February is over. I missed it.

I so don’t care.

The worst part of “working” on the internet is feeling as if you are continuously treading water. I hate that feeling. I know I could be doing things better. I know I could be tweeting more, or that I should figure out facebook. I know that I should attend more conferences, ask to be placed on panels, and further my brand (man, I really hate that term).

I know these things.

but I’ve decided to Just. Not. Care. I read post after post and article after article about outsourcing this or that or using VAs (virtual assistants) to leverage time efficiently.

Guess what I refuse to outsource? The kids.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You know your family the best. You know if you’re “phoning it in”—– please, take stock.

nothing else matters. it really doesn’t.

I’ve done all three acronyms: SAH, WOH, and now WAH. I was actually more on my game when I worked outside the home because I was able to walk away from work completely and be fully engaged. I loved being a stay at home mom, loved every second of it, but did have a nagging feeling in the back of my head that I should be “doing” something to contribute to the family finances, and felt like I didn’t want to lose my identity.

There isn’t a one-size-fits-all answer to finding balance. The only solution is to keep questioning whether or not you’re on the right path. If you aren’t, you’ll  know it. Change course.

Don’t wait.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nigel Marsh did this video (10 min) and it’s worth playing in the background, if you have the chance (there’s a bit of questionable language, so be aware if you’ve got littles on your lap). I found it on the BloggingLabs site (where I go to read, ironically enough, how to be a better blogger).

Enjoy yourself. Enjoy your kids.

Have a great day.

 

Want even more? Buy the book! Totally Together: Shortcuts to an Organized Life is available now. This handy-dandy weekly planner will hold your hand throughout the year and will give you all the reminders and helpful prods you need to have the Very Best Year, ever. No need to wait for the New Year to start your organization mission, you can start at any time. Enjoy!

Making the Most of Your Time

 

Ah, time. There just never seems to be enough, and no matter how hard you try to stop or freeze it, it just keeps on passing.

Everyone always says they would like more money, but is it really money that they want, or is it the freedom of time they believe money can buy?

time to travel. time to garden. time to have a hobby. time to read. time to do yoga.

time to collect garden gnomes.

time to sleep.

Everyone is allotted the same 24 hours each day, so why is it that some people get more done in the day? Are they sacrificing something important? Do they not eat or sleep? Do they have a secret space-time continuum they enter when no one’s looking?

maybe.

Or maybe “these people” have made a conscious decision to treat time as an endangered resource and deliberately choose how each minute/hour is spent instead of allowing it to pass by without notice.

I have always said that I hate rules and I hate people telling me what to do. I still say that, but I know it’s not really true. It’s not true because I never feel more on top of my game as I do when I’ve got a plan in place and follow through. This could be as simple as a meal plan, a plan to pay off a certain bill, a list of chores to check off, or a game plan of how I’m going to teach math facts to my 6-year-old.

so why am I so hesitant to make a daily plan?

Human nature. I know what works for me, but the idea of making a set plan, or list of chores, or daily schedule sounds daunting and overwhelming so I don’t do anything and instead sit on the couch watching OTHER people live their lives on the television.

sound familiar?

We need to end this cycle.

This is it. Move forward from today. Onwards and Upwards!

The difference between successful and unsuccessful people is that the successful people do the things that the unsuccessful do not. –Brian Tracy

related posts:

time management and social media (an oxymoron?)

how to be blissfully happy

making a (non-cheesy) vision board

meal planning for dummies

the Daily 7 For a Highly Successful Household

Permission Granted

I’ve been doing an awful lot of thinking lately about the meaning of life. It’s a deep topic, I know.

I’m not sure that there IS a universal meaning of life or a one-size-fits-all version, but I am beginning to have a clearer view on what it means to me, and to my family.

and it’s pretty simple:

BE HAPPY.

That’s it. It’s terribly simple and ridiculously simplified, but at the end of the day, that’s what really matters to me.

Everyone chooses their own happiness—my happiness is not the same as yours. While I love reveling in a great drama showdown between the Real Housewives on Bravo, I do not want to live drama in my own neighborhood or circle of friends, and therefore change the subject when a girlfriend starts gossiping. While it’s a conversation starter to bring up the weather, I’d rather focus on the GOOD parts of the weather, not the bad. Rain brings flowers, sun gives us Vitamin D., etc.

Does that mean that I’m living in denial about certain things? That I’m acting like a PollyAnna?

maybe.

I recently met (super briefly) Steven Fogel, the author of “My Mind is Not Always My Friend“.

I listened intently as Steven explained that the voices in your head should be treated as a cabinet of advisers, similar to the President’s advisers. YOU are the commander-in-chief of these voices, and YOU get decide what to do with them. Do you take their advice to gossip, or get annoyed and lash out when someone takes your parking space, or do you take the time to step back and look at the entire situation?

Do you immediately get upset when the bag of flour gets dumped all over the kitchen floor, or do you take a step back and realize the flour got dumped because your 4-year-old was trying to make cookies all by himself? For you.

It’s a constant choice, and we’re all works in progress. No one is perfect, and I’m certainly not trying to make it seem as if I act appropriately at all times, because I most certainly don’t. There are days when I both rant and rave.

But I’m working on it. Because at the end of the day, the only thing that matters is that I’ve tried my hardest, the kids are warm, dry, fed, & loved, and Adam feels supported. All the other stuff is trivial.

fluff.

nonsense.

So what’s with the title?

I’ve titled this “permission granted” because I think it’s time that permission IS granted to just be happy. To be thankful. To count the blessings. We’ve had a really hard few years—all of us. Our country is at war, the economy has tanked, millions are out of work, education is plummeting, and people don’t feel safe in large crowds.

it sucks.

But this suckitude (sucky attitude?) is like a virus that spreads, and if you (I) dwell in it, it just spreads and gets worse.

and that’s not good for anyone.

January is practically over. Most people I know started the year feeling FANTASTIC. This was it. 2011 was the year that could do no wrong.

If you find that you’re having a hard time getting this FANTASTIC feeling back, make a change. Distance yourself from negative news/thoughts/feelings/people.

You are in charge. YOU are the commander-in-chief.

related:

how to be blissfully happy

I’m not going to be “that kind” of grown-up

how to make a (non-cheesy) vision board

Remember the WoMom!

I’ve started a Gluten Free TV segment and my very first guest is Shirley Braden, from Gluten Free Easily! click on over to stephanieodea.com to check it out.

Keeping your New Year’s Resolution

It’s January 20.

Do you know where your New Year’s Resolution is?

I’ve gotten some questions lately about how to keep a new year’s resolution—I did the slow cooking thing, blogged about it every day, and then last year posted daily (except on weekends) on this site.

How did I do that?

I just did. Failure was NOT AN OPTION.

I think many people go into a new idea, venture, or resolution half-heartedly and just don’t fully take the measures needed to succeed.

and that’s okay for (a great) many. They just don’t really care.

But if it’s not for you? DON’T DO IT. Don’t be a quitter. Decide to be different, decide to be better, decide to succeed.

You can absolutely exercise everyday if you choose to do so. You can absolutely lose 180 pounds with a common sense approach. You can certainly quit smoking, stop drinking, choose kind words over anger, and resolve once and for all to keep a simplified and tidy home.

Just decide.

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Thank you for your emails and comments wondering where I was—I’m here! Last week I was in New York, and am just now beginning to dig out of the email pile. The new book is doing well, and my days are (this week) filled with various interviews and requests for recipes/images regarding those interviews.

I’m going to do a local news show on Friday, which will be fun.

I’ve started some webTV episodes and hope to continue to post throughout the year. I’ve got two main focuses right now:

Real Moms Making Real Money (at home, in their pajamas) And How You Can, Too!

Gluten Free TV

the first two are up right now, if you’d like to take a look.

Creating a (non-cheesy) Vision Board

Happy New Year!

The beginning of the year is made for day dreamers. What will you DO with yourself this year? Will this be the year you finally get organized? Lose weight? Start exercising daily?

Will this be the year that you move to your dream house? Land the dream job? Find a husband? Get a guinea pig (or two) to love lots and lots for two weeks and then forget all about it (them) and leave mom to clean the cage?

It’s up to you.

No really. It is.

The kids and I made vision boards over the weekend while Adam played with his new iPad. He says he doesn’t need to make a vision board because he already has all he needs/wants in life. I could read this two ways: he’s either fulfilled with me and the girls, or he’s fulfilled with the iPad.

hmm.

I first heard of making Vision Boards because of the book and video, The Secret. Before watching the video, I was already  big goal setter, but liked the visual aspect of putting a vision board “out there.”

To the Universe.

did I lose you?

I know. It sounds terribly hokey, and I think believing that The Universe is going to respond with sunshine and roses just for “putting it out there” is far-fetched and naive,  but I do it anyway.

Here’s why:

1) Writing your goals down forces you to focus on what you really want. You want more money? Great. How are you going to get (attract) this money? Maybe the sign advertising for extra nighttime help at Kohls is a sign (HA! a sign sign. didn’t even plan that one…) from The Universe.

or maybe it’s a coincidence. IT DOESN’T MATTER. What matters is what you DO with this sign (sign!).

2 ) Some people are naturally more visually oriented than others. Flipping through magazine pages is relaxing, and when you’re relaxed and your guard is down, your mind can wander to images that jump out at you. Fancy platform heels and a skintight dress? Maybe this means that deep down you want to either step up your look this  year, or lose weight. Or both.

it’s okay.

Dream Big.

3) It’s fun. Art time is fun time. Let yourself have fun—there’s no need for perfection, and there certainly is no right or wrong way to make a vision board. You can hang a bulletin board over your desk, put words of wisdom on the bathroom mirror, cover your refrigerator with inspirational photos—it’s your choice.

My Vision Board is on the back of my bathroom door. We don’t have a home office, and  I don’t want to explain what this or that means to visitors/family, so I keep it to myself. This is up to you. My friend Kim has a party with some of her close friends and they make their boards together—do whatever is right for you.

But remember: don’t put the stuff up that you think other people want you to. This is for you, and you only. It’s okay to feel greedy, narcissistic, and ridiculous.

you’re in good company.

edited to add 1/25/11: There’s a  new software that’s downloadable and FREE! for making computerized vision boards. I love this idea—you can find any image (online, or from your own stash) to incorporate. Fun!

Also, Lauren emailed to tell me her great idea. She took a digital picture of her vision board and then uses it as the wallpaper on her phone and computer, so she’s constantly reminded of the things she’s working on/trying to attract. Fantastic!

related links:

How to make a vision board–Christine Kane

Host a vision board party–Corporate Mom Drop Outs

Life GPS–Scott Eblin (also a free teleseminar link for Jan 13)

Mapping out Personal Goals (internal link)

What on Earth is Personal Development Anyway? (internal link)

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